DM (to our bard): The six cultists shove you to the ground, bow to the massive green dragon, and say, “Oh Great One, we have brought you this gold and this human sacrifice as tribute to your greatness. Please accept our offering.”
Rest of Party, looking on from a distance: Shit. He’s dead. He’s so dead. RIP Edward.
DM: The dragon thanks the cultists and asks if you have any last words.
Bard: I look up at the dragon and say, “I have brought you this gold and these six cultists as tribute to your greatness.”
Rest of Party: OH SHIT!
DM, who was clearly not expecting that: …………roll persuasion.
Bard: 17.
DM: The dragon says, “I like you. Duck.”
Bard: ….I duck?
DM: The dragon incinerates the cultists with his poison breath and leaves you alive, flying off with his treasure.
Bard: Oh my god. I thought I was dead.
DM: Honestly? So did I.
(via frankenbolt)
Anonymous asked: One of recommended posts under your last ask is the one where anon asks to call you Uncle Mod. It was 1 jan 2015. So happy 3 years of being Uncle I guess?
holy crap that’s two years longer than I have had an actual nibling
Monks confused by band name
Maybe they also are into grunge
#theyre probably not confused and are just the funniest people on earth
(via bowlersandtophats)
Optimistic nihilism only lads
The universe is an open ended sandbox rpg. There’s no end goal. You can only get achievements. Some of them include making other people happy
Drew @modmad‘s wonderful Gladstone design!! I love their art and designs so much
ALL THIS CHOICE ART TODAY aaa thank you :’D
We don’t talk about Matilda.
Felt like drawing ducks today so I bit @modmad‘s Gladstone redesign and did a Magica redesign to go with, because obviously I did a Magica redesign to go with. I really liked the add-on idea of him being a tall dude so there had to be SOMEBODY in there for comparison.