Kate says that I am not a Slytherin because I am not mean, and I should have a cartoon/kid’s book called ‘the nicest Slytherin’ like 'the littlest Hobo’ except it’s me going around being happy and shit with all the other Slytherins looking at me like I’m wearing a turnip on my head.

… okay I added the last bit but seriously I don’t hate anyone.

I am the worst Slytherin.

It’s me.