For those asking What is Up well, the Up that is What is that my grandma’s funeral is this thursday an I was dealing okay with it all before now (she passed very peacefully in the best possible circumstances, and she was very old indeed gosh what a trooper) but I’m starting to get all over the place with it emotionally ‘cause, well, for all she was an odd little bean she was my gran, you know? Also the weather has been so hot lately, only yesterday was it cool enough to think because of the rain and rn my head is one big mess of ideas that need finishing and family that need supporting and on top of it there’s this hole that is there which I didn’t realise would be as significantly big as it is.

I didn’t even encounter her all that much during my life, considering, but she was a big part of my childhood and the reason me and my sister got to travel south and see Poole and Dorset and Brownsea Island (which was effectively a paradise to me- sand dunes and peacocks and red squirrels?! hell yeah!) and that was always such a Big Deal to us. Or me. I don’t know. I’m just, finally really coming to terms with it and what it means to me, and it feels like everything is going to hit a big crunch point this week and I don’t want to be a Hot Mess ™ when my mum needs me to be the one who’s not flipping out. Which is the one I usually am in situations like this. :(
Sorry. TMI but you guys deserve to know why I’m likely to be a bit wonky this week so… yeah. I’ll focus on getting TPoH done in time but god knows what else I’ll be doing I just hope I can level my feelings out enough in time.