Everything I draw ends up wearing a bow-tie

something long and not funny about why I get anxious about a thing please feel free to ignore

Hit J to skip it’s very TL:DR

So I’ve had people asking about the SKIP (feature) thing, and while I’m sure you’re all tired of me restating that I come up with the characters and then they tell me what the story is that really is what happens to me, and in this case Arthur and Mesi came with a full feature film attached. The SKIP short you know was an abbreviation of the main aspects of it; inter-filmic travel and them being adorable.

What you may not know (or, at least, I can’t remember if I made a post about it), is that this crazy fun-times feature film in my head gives me enormous anxiety. Because I handed the entire plot to someone that I didn’t know.

Allow me to explain first that VFS was wonderful, is wonderful, and I love it and regret nothing about attending the course. What happened was something unusual, and only really a fault of my not asking for confirmation and for doing too much work. That stated our character design lessons were great and my teacher was and is a super great guy, like wow what a guy so cool. When we got an assignment to draw three characters from a feature I went at it full tilt. I wound up not only designing three characters, but a whole spectrum of supporting cast and a rough script outline. Start to finish, the big finale, the critical points of character development, the whole thing. I handed it in… and only got the character design sheet of the main three back.

I was, naturally, a little bit upset about it as the drawings had all been originals and I had no copies, but when I asked my teacher he was as surprised as I was that I’d only got the one sheet back. As it turns out the assignments were not being marked by the same guy who was giving us the lessons; a little unusual but not a fault necessarily. Two points of feedback are better than one and all that. My problem was, and is, that I didn’t know this person. I have had trust problems with teachers before, and to this day I don’t know if this mysterious other simply threw away the extra work, or kept it. If it was the former I would be overjoyed. The thing that has made me wake up in a cold sweat at four in the morning once a week for the past three years is the prospective of the latter. I live in perpetual fear of waking up to find a trailer for a corrupted version of my own film staring back at me on the internet. Paranoid, yes, but there it is. I can’t lie about it, I am constantly anxious about it, and even if I am busy enough to forget about it most of the time it bubbles back to the surface time and time again.

I am, as I hope you might know to be true by now, really quite critical of my own work, so I hope you understand what it means for me to say that I really believe that the SKIP feature is a good film. It is a good story. If this unknown person (whose name I have long forgotten and who I am almost afraid to seek out), thought the same of it and acted immediately they could quite well have me over a barrel, as I only finished the short film a good ten months or so after submitting that assignment. I know this is probably a fruitless and embarrassing confession of how truly unraveled my general state of mind is and that I am being overly suspicious and egoistic, but a story writer’s brain is always asking ‘what if?’ and mine is likely doomed to keep asking that question about this until I make this film, or someone else beats me to it.

Anyway sorry for the text splurge I think I just really needed to get that off my chest.

Anonymous asked: but seriously I'm just sat here waiting for what happens when Neil Gaiman finds out about TPoH like what will your fandom even do

well first of all they’ll have to hold a funeral

for me

because I will die

Anonymous asked: what would you say RGB's muscular 'build' is? I know we can't see any of it exactly but he seems very athletic

You took the word right out of my mouth- he’s very athletic. Not exactly a tank but definitely on the opposite side of scrawny. I researched his body type by looking at Olympic figure skaters (and of course a certain very sturdily-built silent comedian), so although he’s compact there’s a powerhouse of muscle in there… or at least there was.

Don’t let the being short, invisible, and cowardly throw you; RGB isn’t just elegantly proportioned, his physical form is exemplary.

/cries because wonderful director saved the best scene that’s still to be done for me specifically even though he could have given it to someone else because I took a break to go to Canada for the wrap party